Wednesday, 27 January 2016

A public show of affection!!!!

Who doesn't remember school assemblies? You know the ones where you get to stand up and go beetroot whilst everyone either applauds you or sings you the 'congratulations song' (without rhyme or rhythm) and every one is supposedly proud of you?

This is where today's story begins, a similar situation!

Now Miss R was a teacher who made sugar taste bitter! She was so sweet, prim and proper that she was nicknamed Miss Honey (the teacher from the popular Roald Dahl book Matilda, go figure!).

All of the children loved her and they would often say so, and when she gave her award in the assembly, she would not simply say what it was for, she would embellish the point until the child would come out to the front of the hall with the biggest head in the city, and the rest of the school was  expecting fucking Einstein to grace the school with his presence!

Oh yes everyone loved Miss (perfect) R! But was she ready for what came next?

A girl, who we shall call M,who had learning difficulties, had picked up on every child's obvious love for Miss R. She was sat in front of Miss R whilst said teacher was giving her weekly sweeter than sugar speech about a child in her class when M began to interrupt...

Miss R continued undeterred by M, but M carried on calling her!

Finally Miss R lost her seemingly never ending patience and said "M what is the matter?"
M replied "I love you so much!"
To which Miss R said, looking around the rest of the hall with an element of smugness, "Oh I love you too!"
M then said "I've got a present for you!"
Miss R duly held her hand out and M took her hand from her underwear and put a little poop in her hand!

Needless to say chaos ensued all there were screams and shouts, teachers rushing towards M to obviously remove her as she had had an accident and then there was the pasty coloured, frozen in horror Miss R still holding the ever so generous 'present' which had been so benevolently bestowed upon her!!!! React to that 'Miss Honey!'

Its time for that chorus:

Oh the things they say!!!!

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